UPDATE:
Well, due to being surrounded by pussies masquerading as men, this woman continues to go insane......
Recently, as we were preparing an assignment for a client, she decides to make some radical changes at the last minute. Although I wanted to remain neutral so that I could just observe the dynamics of this situation, I felt I had to speak up, since NONE of the other guys did; so I told her that it was unwise to make such drastic changes at the last minute, which would involve a lot of preparation on our parts, and would invariably have a negative impact on the quality of our assignment. She stuck to her guns very stubbornly, and while she & I debated back & forth (alway cordially - there is a GREAT DEAL of mutual respect between she and I), the other "manginas" kept their mouths shut.
As a matter of fact, at a later point when we were going through some other stuff, the guy who assembled this team in the first place asked me why I was being so negative. Now, there is also some friction between he & I due to his trying to take advantage of me in a personal way, where I had to put my foot down HARD - dammit, it's worth reiterating at this point that there are some details that I wish to leave out to protect my anonymity, but the picture you get will unfortunately remain incomplete as a result; sorry about that.....
So anyway, after all this, we met again to start putting it together, and it was glaringly obvious that I was the only one - aside from her - who had put in the work required on his end to accommodate these changes. After that meeting, when everyone else had left and I was still packing up my shit, she stayed behind and asked me in a very maternal way what was wrong. I considered underplaying what I felt so that I could remain an impartial observer and not affect the situation if I could help it, but I had an overwhelming compulsion to let her know what was on my mind. This particular feeling seemed to involve no animosity to her or others, just a strong urge to inform her about what I thought, and it seemed to be above both logic and emotion (can't really describe it, but it wasn't like a feeling, not quite emotion like anger or a desire to vent, etc.), so I figured it was my gut talking to me, and so I decided to let her know what I thought.
I told her that I recognised that she enjoyed the fact that she was with a team that was talented & knowledgeable enough to be able to make the kinds of changes she wanted at the last minute, where it would be impossible for others to do so. But I went on to say that to use this ability on a whim, when it is not necessary, is an abuse of it, and not acceptable in my mind. I told her that, in the future, if she wants to make changes like this, she is going to have to give me enough time to make adequate preparations, or I am not going to do it, the exception being in cases where it is an emergency and therefore unavoidable. She agreed with no reluctance whatsoever, and seemed to totally get where I was coming from.
Note: i'd love to be able to say that she noticed my mood because she's very intuitive, which she is, and that the lack of sleep I endured in order to make sure I had my end of things covered made me grumpier than usual, but the honest truth is that I still need to work on my 'cloaking'; watching what is happening, and having some slight idea of the mechanics of the male/female dynamic thanks to you guys, is making this shit painful to endure...... But i'll carry on and remember to let my feelings pass through me unhindered; this is a good exercise for me.
So anyway, we have the final meeting before presentation to the client, and the others STILL do not have their parts of the changes ready. She is clearly pissed, and all the other guys afterwards ask her what's wrong. "Oh, it's nothing" is her reply. Anyway, she discretely lets me know that she wants to talk to me, so I arrange it so that I am still packing up my shit when the other guys are leaving. When it's just she and I, she asks me to let her vent, and I say ok. She is totally pissed with the other guys, and disappointed in them, and she even remarks on something that's been on my mind since she unofficially took over the team. She comments that the guy who formed this team should be leading it, and he's just leaving everything up to her.
Remember what I said when I started this thread:
Well, true to form, she has been slowly taking over the team (the one who started this team basically rolled over and handed the reigns to her), and her decisions have been lousy
I listened and let her get it off her chest; my only observation to her was that if she had given us enough time to incorporate the changes, (as I expect her to do from now on), then the other guys wouldn't have a leg to stand on when she confronts them about their lack of preparation. In any case, she says she's going to have a serious talk with them about what's been happening.
Anyways, we made the presentation to the client, and have been paid for it, so we'll see what they say about hiring us again, what remarks they make about the quality of our work, etc. We'll also see what happens when (if) she has this "serious talk".....
Will keep you posted.
To use a metaphor, it sems to me that if a man is driving, and hands the woman the steering wheel out of deference to the fact that she is a woman, she will drive it over a cliff.......
...... and will blame the man for letting her do so. And perhaps rightfully so?
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