When it comes to meeting new women, is it better to approach and/or wait to get approached?
Wait to get approached - nah.... Do your stuff, if they want to they will... don't wait for them, wait is really the wrong word.
What do you guys think? What do you guys DO?
Personally, I do not 'approach' as such. I may have a chat with someone but it is not thinking appproach, it is usually because they have put themselves close to me, or really grabbed my awareness, however it is not from the mindset of approach - more of lets see what they are about.
They have to come to me, this is not an ego thing, it comes from hrm.. ok, firstly I would say it shows their interest level in you, shows they have the nerve to do it, that they have had a good enough read on you, that they are not just playing as a validation/ego monkey. They will either bring their group along (relatively common) or isolate themselves to come over, which works in both of your benefits. It also makes them more compliant, as they are doing something they want to do in the first place, it sets you apart from most of the guys chasing them constantly.
It also gives them what they truly want, as said before.. They love the chase and the thrill of the chase, they want to have to work for what they will get, that way it feels more valuable when they achieve their aim.
Most times I have found that if you are confident in your masculinity, that open energy will gives girls a reason for them to approach you. They will come up with all kinds of crazy reasons to "open" you.
This is so true.
When they do 'open' you as Inrgee puts it, they will do things that will blow your mind openness wise (at least at the start).. Similar to Kidd's story where she just walks up and sits in his lap.
Really once motivated they will do things that will bring a smile to your face and hers, they can be very ballsy indeed, I have found myself bursting into laughter at some of the things that have happened over the years, they also did as they appreciated that I had noticed just what they had done.
I had one woman, a few years ago who walked up to where I was sitting with two friends, she just sat down next to me, without looking at me first, linked her arm into mine, I looked at her wondering who she was, she looked me in the eyes and said 'I want to meet you, I have been watching you and want to spend time with you' (really relaxed body language, not nervous at all, like she had known me for years, not full on, she was comfortable sitting there). One of my friends nearly fell off his chair the other ones jaw hit the table, quite literally he was just staring at her totally surprised.
We had a really natural conversation, she had no nerves at all. (she had made up her mind what she was going to do, she knew I would not freak out or anything and she DID IT) I did not either, the way she approached showed me she was someone I wanted to meet also, someone I wanted to find more about. Someone who was on a similar wavelength to me.
Gradually as the night went on, her WHOLE group of friends gradually gravitated across the venue to around where we were sitting, till there was about 40-50 people surrounding us. I did not notice until they were pretty much all there and suddenly looked up to see us sitting in this sea of people, we had been so in the bubble talking. My friends ended up being chatted to by some of her friends.
A couple of her what seemed like really close female friends tried to muscle in on the conversation and tried challenging me lightly and got firmly but quietly put in their place by her at which point they stopped being that way and just relaxed into it. I had not reacted to them at all negatively and took their comments as playful jealousy, let them ride and let her deal with them, they were her friends.
The manageress of the place (who I knew) caught me when I was coming back from the toilets at some point and gave me one of my favourite drinks with a real big smile on her face, she said she had not seen anything like that for years and it really made her day, she could not believe it. She also leaned into me and said 'That girl wants fucking tonight', I remember clearly smiling at her in a half way and saying 'I know', she beamed at me and sent me back to them.
The whole group was watching us, my friends told me later, I was aware of it partially but they laid out to me just how much later when we talked.
I ended up saying it was time we left to my friends. My friends were in a seperate car and said they would wait leave later. I got up, looked at her and put my hand out to her and she just put hers in it and I led her out to my car - she followed without hesitation, there were a few gasps from others in the group but not of surprise. We Left.
I later heard from my friends that within about 2-3 minutes of us leaving the whole group had dispersed and gone to other areas of the venue, in smaller groups and they were left on their own and then they left.
They still talk about it today, every now and then one or the other of them will bring up the story. Really nice memory to look back upon, how the evening went and the whole vibe of the whole thing.
After that night they started to listen to some of the things I had been saying to them for years, they had both said I was crazy at some point or another - that night blew their perceptions apart.
I had not noticed her at ALL prior to her coming up to me, my friends had not noticed her either, she had been hidden within her group which was on the other side of the venue.