Then I'm apathetic ... (but I don't care ...

)
You say :
the second dude is indifferent, he will have a good time, engage in conversations with people who share the same core values as him, he will be happy to make new friends and stay in contact with the people he met (who share the same core values as him) but he will not be needy about it- which means that even if those people don't want to be his friends- it's ok, no worries. He still had a good time talking to them at the party and exchanging ideas with them.
He enjoys interactions and can get excited about people or other things but at the same time: he is not afraid of losing people or things because he understands how everything is.
He lives in the moment, enjoys people and things but he is not attached to them so he doesn't live in fear of losing them.
What does he want out of these interactions ?
How does he know who shares the same core values ? (He speaks to every people he thinks could share them and excuse himself when they don't ? seems time consuming)
one dude is apathetic, he will just sit all alone not giving a shit about anyone or anything, he will talk to people who talk to him but still he doesn't give a shit about anyone or anything.
Result: this dude will have a lot of misery in his life. He won't have much social connections or real friendships, he will never get excited about people or other things - which is kind of a depressing way to live.
Now if the description is correct, the 'misery in his life' and 'depressing way to live' are more likely your projections on this kind of guy. (because you see apathy as 'bad')
If he doesn't give a shit, he just doesn't give a shit.
If he's afraid of talking, of making new friends, of opening up to others, then yeah he could be depressed.
Maybe it's the difference between an extrovert guy (who likes to speak) and an introvert guy (who prefers quiet) rather than a different kind of emotion.
If apathy's bad, what's the cure ?
Feigning interests in other people's lives if you don't ?
REALLY having interests in other people's lives ?
Meeting people with the same core values as you and ignoring those who don't ?
'Always talking to strangers' (Wygant's way) ?
Isn't it possible to be apathetic when there's nobody around, but indifferent when dealing with people ?

(meaning not going to every party, every gathering of people just to meet some, but when you meet someone in your day, being indifferent to the outcome)
Why does it have to be one or the other ?
Haa! I'm Apathyc most of the time
That's the grey area
