Exceptional Leo!
Look at how much you've written!
Have a gold Star!
Let's see what we've got here...
....1...2...3....
I'm going to try and be brief here so I may miss out a few things, but a nice little eye opener has called me thus;
In 2012 I was with a girl for 6 months. First 2 months were great(when I was totally indifferent), and then when she started demanding MOAR, things changed. I naturally declined her invitations of co-habitation and demands to meet my whoke fuckin' family
But I kept her on anyway in spite of my better judgement; such was my enslavement to the penis and sympish need for companionship!
Not going to lie; I wasn't always tight during these months, and the inner symp surfaced at the last. In GENERAL, however, I was ok. Sex was through the roof, but as the months went on she realised I wasn't going to give anywhere near what she wanted - to be the centre of my world, family, financial stability, to be treated like a princess - the usual.
Eventually she got bored(her words) and left me. My reaction was a little loose to say the least. Anyhow, within weeks she was with another guy(who, incidentally, paid for her to go on holiday with him within weeks of dating). I reasoned that I didn't really have any true grievances with her, despite a bruised ego.
We met up a few months later, whereby she disclosed that her sex life was like the Antarctic wildnerness. As a joke I emailed her and offered, in the name of friendship, one night only of some good lovin'. She took it much more seriously than I presumed she would, and respectfully declined, probably with a facial expression like this
I laugh it off, we part ways, I TOTALLY FORGET about her.
A year goes by. She's broken up with her BF, who over the course of their year together proved himself to be a wreck of a man and yada yada yada. She's broke and homeless. So I get the text;
'Can I take you up on that one night offer?'
'I'll consider it''.
Naturally I'm suspicious, but I am just too damn curious about people and I reason to myself that although she's full of shit, I'll make some prising attempts to ascertain her motives; don't get me wrong here, I do still hold attraction for her - but I'm beginning to see it as some form of attachment due to the fact that she left me. I'm not sure I'd feel the same had the roles been reversed.
Anyhow, I tell her we will commence negotiations and to state her terms;
'I don't know, play it by ear. I just want to see you really. I miss the intimacy and fantasy'.
I see where this is going. She's stretching the original terms of my offer and engaging with the idea emotionally. Nontheless she proceeds to email me all the things that she wishes to do with me, which were filthy, outrageous, and frankly I'm shocked that women actually think this way
. I was toying with the idea of fucking her again; I'm more interested in seeing through the whole charade than getting my end away, but If I could do
both then I would.
A week goes by and I agree to meet her in the city. We exchange messages and I make it clear, whilst not explicitly stating, that things are on my terms, and that she has to pick me up, when I want, and the time that is convenient for me. Since women respond to orders very well, she complies without any resistance.
Turns out things weren't really on my terms
She sent me a message earlier, which went a little something like this; 'Y'know I don't know if I really do want to have sex. I really do want to hang out though, like buddies'.
I'm not surprised. I actually don't know whether she wants to fuck or not, but due to my improving mindset and newfound abundance of women coming into my life, I find myself unemotional and unaffected by it. It no longer surprises me the ways in which they manipulate their environment and people around them with the goal of ego validation and social dominance. Women have become a casual, objective experiment to me, and this is just a further unfolding of my research. I definitely made a few mistakes within this whole interaction but I feel the greater understanding I have gleaned surpasses them.
And with every experience I have with women, I gain a deeper understanding of their manipulative nature, and I wonder how it is that I ever thought they deserved any significant attention at all. I've also come to realise that their predicament in the Matrix is
far worse than ours, atleast from where I'm seeing it right now.
I haven't replied to her yet. Maybe I won't, unless I feel like getting more out of this particular lesson. To summarise, I got played a little here but I'm happy that I got to see through the matter.
.....12....13...maybe 14?
about 13 paragraphs give or take.
You do realise, don't you, that all this:
We met up a few months later, whereby she disclosed that her sex life was like the Antarctic wildnerness. As a joke I emailed her and offered, in the name of friendship, one night only of some good lovin'. She took it much more seriously than I presumed she would, and respectfully declined, probably with a facial expression like this
I laugh it off, we part ways, I TOTALLY FORGET about her.
A year goes by. She's broken up with her BF, who over the course of their year together proved himself to be a wreck of a man and yada yada yada. She's broke and homeless. So I get the text;
'Can I take you up on that one night offer?'
'I'll consider it''.
Naturally I'm suspicious, but I am just too damn curious about people and I reason to myself that although she's full of shit, I'll make some prising attempts to ascertain her motives; don't get me wrong here, I do still hold attraction for her - but I'm beginning to see it as some form of attachment due to the fact that she left me. I'm not sure I'd feel the same had the roles been reversed.
Anyhow, I tell her we will commence negotiations and to state her terms;
'I don't know, play it by ear. I just want to see you really. I miss the intimacy and fantasy'.
I see where this is going. She's stretching the original terms of my offer and engaging with the idea emotionally. Nontheless she proceeds to email me all the things that she wishes to do with me, which were filthy, outrageous, and frankly I'm shocked that women actually think this way
. I was toying with the idea of fucking her again; I'm more interested in seeing through the whole charade than getting my end away, but If I could do
both then I would.
A week goes by and I agree to meet her in the city. We exchange messages and I make it clear, whilst not explicitly stating, that things are on my terms, and that she has to pick me up, when I want, and the time that is convenient for me. Since women respond to orders very well, she complies without any resistance.
Turns out things weren't really on my terms
She sent me a message earlier, which went a little something like this; 'Y'know I don't know if I really do want to have sex. I really do want to hang out though, like buddies'.
I'm not surprised. I actually don't know whether she wants to fuck or not, but due to my improving mindset and newfound abundance of women coming into my life, I find myself unemotional and unaffected by it. It no longer surprises me the ways in which they manipulate their environment and people around them with the goal of ego validation and social dominance. Women have become a casual, objective experiment to me, and this is just a further unfolding of my research. I definitely made a few mistakes within this whole interaction but I feel the greater understanding I have gleaned surpasses them.
And with every experience I have with women, I gain a deeper understanding of their manipulative nature, and I wonder how it is that I ever thought they deserved any significant attention at all. I've also come to realise that their predicament in the Matrix is
far worse than ours, atleast from where I'm seeing it right now.
I haven't replied to her yet. Maybe I won't, unless I feel like getting more out of this particular lesson. To summarise, I got played a little here but I'm happy that I got to see through the matter
was perpetuated by this:
My reaction was a little loose to say the least.
and say the least you did.
As least as you possibly could say. Actually, you did mention something about an inner symp or something. No detail of course. Don't wanna look too bad in front of your faceless online know better friends.
Since you've taken the effort to ensure that no one here actually knows what you did wrong, no can give you any specific advice, like, don't do this next time, or do this.
Just pick some principles, stick to them and be consistent with them. Change them when your principles evolve.
You can perform this task by yourself. There is nothing wrong with expressing an interest in anything (hint) as long as it doesn't go against your principles. If it goes by your own personal constitution; do it. If not don't do it. However, you get to write that document. No one else.
That's as simple as it gets really.