There's alot more to that than just the women issue, this 'subself' you speak of, whatever problems it has translates into everything so there has to be a root, looks like you found it.
I just used women as an example because thats what people coming here can care the most about at first. Its also helped me get over some of my neediness for friendship and anger I held towards my parents and sister.
I see a lot of guys here with certain problems and I often see a subself problem within them.
For example if you were to find that around bigger more attractive and "alpha" men you get insecure for no apparant reason, its most likely a subself. You're not naturally insecure thats the horseshit and nail varnish I mentioned above.