Alright guys, I've been mulling this over all day. Here's how I interpreted you advice, please tell me if I'm right or correct me if I'm headed in the wrong direction.
The point of it all is to give up the illusion of control over anything that's happening outside you, in which lies the path to indifference. You don't want to have anything happen because you don't care what happens, since you know you can't influence it.
To get rid of this clenching controlling feeling of holding on to what's outside of you (at least that's what I'm feeling), controlling your actions, you have to find out why it's there in the first place. Recognize it as something that's there to protect you. It wants to be heard, so you don't judge or try to control/change the emotions, you let them be and see what they want to do. In a way, you're giving up control over something that you can't control (your emotions), which means it doesn't have power over you anymore.
One big thing to remember moose is that attachment to non-attachment is still attachment.
This blew my noodle quite a bit. So give up control over anything at all ever happening and just observing and enjoying what you can't control? Is that it?
Conceptually it's on the right track.. you are going into it just to experience and be with it without an agenda. Even 'enjoying' it is an agenda. In the process of the energy moving, healing, change, etc. it can be ugly and your deepest darkest shit can (and in fact needs to at some point) come up and be integrated rather than being suppressed, denied, and projected, which in many ways is human suffering in a nutshell.
Dunno if you saw that video but letting go is not about forcing all those things out or it to happen -- if it's ugly or unpleasant that's the reality
and you take your hands off of trying to control/change it and you LET it do what it does because it knows what to do -- water knows where to flow.
One of the hardest things to let go of for us is wanting to know the right way to do it or have the perfect conceptual model.
Remember that even getting the most perfect answer and conceptual model is like getting the best description possible of what riding a bike is like. Or getting a really great, accurate description of what an orange tastes like if you've never had one. No matter what it's about getting on the bike over and over again, which I suggest you just keep doing. There are various, free, meditation/body awareness etc type exercises that deal with this -- the technique itself is just to focus your attention, it's about just being present with it without an agenda which takes training because having an agenda is a trained habit
You are better served thinking of this like training and the dropping of agenda/thought etc something akin to quitting heroin than just hearing the right way to do it and having it just happen.
It's a double edged sword because in some ways it is great that techniques and teaching that comes from these old traditions is getting out there a little bit (stuff like 'the secret') but they are in such convoluted and often "it's so quick and easy!" versions for marketing purposes that they get diluted or we think inner work is somehow just the right happy thoughts. Quick massive things can and do happen but it's not about that. I really believe people would be better served if they approached these types of undertaking with *at least* the level of seriousness if they were going to become a boxer or something, it's daily practice, training, overcoming resistance/yourself, etc. in the vast vast majority of cases.
Also remember that non-attachment and all the "right" stuff happens with total presence.
Have you ever had an orgasm before? Is your mind 'there' - are you even possibly thinking about attachment or non attachment or if you're 'doing' having an orgasm right? haha. It's one of the closest things to becoming fully present which is one of the main reasons the attachment to sex is strong.