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 Post subject: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 3:53 am 
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I went out to the club on friday and around 1:00 am i said fuck it not alot of women so i decided to go home.As i was walking back to my car i hear somebody yelling excuse me!!As i turn around i see this petite asian girl(about 7/10) and as i walk up to her she tells me that she asks me for directions to the nearest cab.I give her directions and as i am ready to walk away
Her:Can you give me a ride to my car.My friends abandoned me(This woman was pissed drunk)
Me:No, sorry
Her:Please, I will give you hundred bucks
Me:Sorry i don't know you
Her:Please, i will take you the atm and give you the cash
Me:I am sorry but i don't give rides to random strangers
At this point she is begging me to take her
Her(Starts crying)Listen i have never been in this situation before, i am really in trouble.
Me:Alright i'll take you
She hands me her credit card along the way
Her:(She starts talking about her problems/Wanting to kill herself/Bad relationship with parents/Lots of crying)I am going through a bad relationship at the moment and feel very lonely.
I just give her space to cry and she grabs my arm as we are walking towards my car.I can tell this girl is very depressed
Her:Your such a nice guy.Most people are selfish and wouldn't be doing this.
Me:I am not a Nice Guy.Don't let my looks deceive you.
Her:And i am not a nice girl
Her:Can we go to Denny's(She offered to pay for my meal)
Me:No i am going to drop you off and go home(At this point i realized that it wasn't a ride to her car that she wanted me to take her home and i could have taken her home if i really tried but i was too tired to pursue that route)
One of her friends yells her name and tries to stop him she ignores him.Another guy she came with stopped her and tells me that she came with him.I said ok cool and told him to talk to her.He tells her that her purse and keys are in there car(group of viatenamese guys)however,she refused to go with them and started walking my way.Eventually, the guy grabbed her and she gave in.They offered to give me a ride to my car but i refused.She gave me both of her phone numbers and told me to call her.I texted her the following day asking her if she made it back safely but no reply.I'm thinking to give her a phone call and leave it at that if she doesn't answer.She was really wasted so i wouldn't be surprised if she forgot me.Anyways i will be moving to the east coast in about a week and wouldn't mind having a short term affair if i could get a hold of her.
*I would have offered my number and left it at that but she didn't have her phone on her.
*This woman was pissed drunk and so vulnerable that i wouldn't respect myself if i banged her while she was wasted.At the moment it felt so easy that i didn't want to do it.
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me(Although she was wasted) because i have never been approached by someone like that.I do wonder if she would of done the same if she was sober.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 4:49 am 
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What is it about her that attracts you? You should take some time to reflect on that. :geek:

Your post is riddled with symptoms that point to a larger problem. It's not about this girl...look at it from another angle. ;)

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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 5:55 am 
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Location: The side of a mountain somewhere...
Quote:
i said fuck it not alot of women so i decided to go home
Quote:
i could have taken her home if i really tried but i was too tired to pursue that route
what do these statements communicate about your mindset?

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 7:15 am 
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caliboy85 wrote:
Her:(She starts talking about her problems/Wanting to kill herself/Bad relationship with parents/Lots of crying)I am going through a bad relationship at the moment and feel very lonely.

Quote:
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me.

:lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 7:28 am 
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Scarf wrote:
caliboy85 wrote:
Her:(She starts talking about her problems/Wanting to kill herself/Bad relationship with parents/Lots of crying)I am going through a bad relationship at the moment and feel very lonely.

Quote:
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me.

:lol:
[ img ]

:o

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:ugeek:


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 8:17 am 
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Dali wrote:
[ img ] :o
Beautiful image Dali 8-) :D

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Tue Apr 02, 2013 10:33 pm 
You ain't got it right man..............PLEASE TELL ME THAT ALL THAT DRAMA MADE YOU FORGET TO GIVE HER BACK HER CREDIT CARD.

If not....you are very nice.

ALSO PLEASE DO EXACTLY WHAT A WOMAN TELLS YOU TO DO WHEN SHE OFFERS YOU HER NUMBER. IT'S THE EASIEST THING IN THE WORLD TO DO. IF SHE DOESN'T ANSWER YOUR CALL THEN YOU LEAVE A MESSAGE. IF SHE DOESN'T RETURN YOUR MESSAGE THEN SHE ISN'T INTERESTED.

IF YOU KEPT HER CREDIT CARD THEN THE MESSAGE IS SIMPLE.

YOU SHOULD HAVE EXPECTED THE UNEXPECTED TO POP UP BECAUSE SHE WAS DRUNK, BECAUSE SHE ASKED YOU TO DIRECTIONS FOR A CAB, BECAUSE SHE ASKED YOU TO GIVE HER A RIDE TO HER CAR, BECAUSE SHE STARTED CRYING, BECAUSE SHE TOLD YOU THAT SHE WAS ALONE BUT TURNED AROUND AND SAID THAT SHE WAS IN A BAD RELATIONSHIP........BAD RELATIONSHIP GUYS AREN'T FAR BEHIND....GET MY DRIFT?


ALSO IF YOU LEARNED ANYTHING FROM YOUR ABOUT FRONT FROM THE THREAD YOU POSTED THEN YOU SHOULD COUNT THAT AS WHAT BROUGHT HER TOO YOU.

CAPS LOCK IS TIIIIIIGGGGHHHHHTTTTTTT!!!!!!


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:38 am 
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Posts: 244
Dali wrote:
Scarf wrote:
caliboy85 wrote:
Her:(She starts talking about her problems/Wanting to kill herself/Bad relationship with parents/Lots of crying)I am going through a bad relationship at the moment and feel very lonely.

Quote:
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me.

:lol:
[ img ]

:o
Are you saying that i attracted a woman who is depressed/lonely because i am depressed?That this is a mirror image of myself?


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:48 am 
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Meraki wrote:
Quote:
i said fuck it not alot of women so i decided to go home
Lets be honest i wouldn't go to the club if it was a sausage festival.For me there's no point in going if there are no women(I don't think this means that your mindset is weak just because you don't go to the club if there are no women)..Now with this being said i don't hit on them or chase them i just scan the room and notice who's checking me out.Mostly i am observing
Quote:
i could have taken her home if i really tried but i was too tired to pursue that route
I don't mean pursuing in the sense of chasing hard and being all up in her ass.All i had to do was agree with her when she asked to go to Denny's(She was gonna cash me out too) but i was too tired and instead declined her offer.If i agreed i don't think that would be pursuing rather it would just meant i reciprocated accordingly.

what do these statements communicate about your mindset?


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:12 am 
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I am not saying. I am making an observation, with the help of an image.

What do you observe? You directly experienced this, not me.

Have you read your post more than four/five times and spotted a pattern(s)?
Have you read it to see it from a different angle? (if you were the girl, or his friend, or the taxi cab dude, or a third person observing the dynamic you wrote from a birds eye perspective, if you were blind and can only hear the changes of the voices/tempo/emotional charged [yourself and the asian girl])
Have you cut the ego form the history? Can you tell where it is?
Did you play that scenario in your head complete in mute, and observed the girls faces and body language and gauged emotional reactions in that time?

I can go on and on.....

To me comes to sight like in huge bold gold letters and blinking, I am talking about the subconsious talking/writing/projecting.

Also;
Reading this as a impartial observer, aids to spot patterns. You could do this too.

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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:56 am 
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caliboy85 wrote:
I went out to the club on friday and around 1:00 am i said fuck it not alot of women so i decided to go home.
Wrong mindset.
caliboy85 wrote:
Her(Starts crying)Listen i have never been in this situation before, i am really in trouble.

Me:Alright i'll take you
Was it really your problem?. I would have walked away and gone home drama free.
caliboy85 wrote:
Her:Your such a nice guy.Most people are selfish and wouldn't be doing this.
Me:I am not a Nice Guy.Don't let my looks deceive you.
You were being a nice guy.
caliboy85 wrote:
I texted her the following day asking her if she made it back safely

Why?.
caliboy85 wrote:
I'm thinking to give her a phone call
Don't.
caliboy85 wrote:
*This woman was pissed drunk and so vulnerable that i wouldn't respect myself if i banged her while she was wasted.At the moment it felt so easy that i didn't want to do it.
It's supposed to be easy but she was wasted and you were sober, that would have been taking advantage of someone vs her coming to you of her own volition.
caliboy85 wrote:
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me(Although she was wasted) because i have never been approached by someone like that.I do wonder if she would of done the same if she was sober.
She approached you because she was drunk and looking for a sucker to take her away from the drama she most likely created with these dudes. A chick approaching you does not automatically make her an X factor.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 12:47 pm 
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I'm more inclined to be nice to people that haven't done anything to personally wrong me...depending on the situation. If I can see that they're geniunely having issues I'll help them work through it.

She'd never be considered as a girlfriend or even a casual thing based on what you said about her...but that doesn't mean I wouldn't do something nice (not expecting or wanting anything in return)

Again all depending...if it was just her being a drunk attention whore...I'd just be like move along :| .

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 3:03 pm 
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Location: Levelling up.
Apart from Scarf, you guys are being way too reasonable.

Caliboy, pull yourself together man. Re-read what you wrote. Every word. Then get a grip and consider what the hell you were and are thinking.

Astonished.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:42 pm 
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Alchemist wrote:
caliboy85 wrote:
I went out to the club on friday and around 1:00 am i said fuck it not alot of women so i decided to go home.
Wrong mindset.
caliboy85 wrote:
Her(Starts crying)Listen i have never been in this situation before, i am really in trouble.

Me:Alright i'll take you
Was it really your problem?. I would have walked away and gone home drama free.
caliboy85 wrote:
Her:Your such a nice guy.Most people are selfish and wouldn't be doing this.
Me:I am not a Nice Guy.Don't let my looks deceive you.
You were being a nice guy.
caliboy85 wrote:
I texted her the following day asking her if she made it back safely

Why?.
caliboy85 wrote:
I'm thinking to give her a phone call
Don't.
caliboy85 wrote:
*This woman was pissed drunk and so vulnerable that i wouldn't respect myself if i banged her while she was wasted.At the moment it felt so easy that i didn't want to do it.
It's supposed to be easy but she was wasted and you were sober, that would have been taking advantage of someone vs her coming to you of her own volition.
caliboy85 wrote:
*I am wondering if this woman is an X-FACTOR to me(Although she was wasted) because i have never been approached by someone like that.I do wonder if she would of done the same if she was sober.
She approached you because she was drunk and looking for a sucker to take her away from the drama she most likely created with these dudes. A chick approaching you does not automatically make her an X factor.
the point is, look at who he thinks might be HIS "TRINITY" /X-FACTOR :roll:

dude needs to rebuild that core, STAT!

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"I'd rather have no bitch than a half a bitch" Iceberg Slim


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:28 pm 
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Its in my nature to help those who are in trouble.Yeah she could have dealt with it on her own but if i was in a trouble some situation i would be glad if someone helped me.What goes around comes around.Anyways with regards to the girl you guys asked what did i observe?Well for one i wasn't as needy as i would have been in the past.I gave her SPACE to vent her emotions, which i think made her more open and i could have tried to persuade her to come with me when her friends were trying to get her to stay.Honestly, i would have been fine if she walked away at any moment during the walk as i would have done the same.Yes,there is a part of me that wished she would stay in touch and that would have been the desired outcome.The difference now is that i am not overly attached to that outcome.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Wed Apr 03, 2013 11:45 pm 
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caliboy: re-read this thread as though all your posts had been written by me.

What would you say to me?

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:19 am 
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I don't man know maybe i was a little too attached with the idea of being unattached and not needing her other than that i don't see anything.I still don't believe that because you leave a club that has lots of guys and very few girls you have the wrong mindset.People go to clubs for different reasons.You can still desire to be in the presence of women and not act like you are pursuing.The two are mutually exclusive.I thought Unattachment was desiring to get them but not beating yourself up if you don't get the result you want.At least that's what it means to me.


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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:26 am 
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caliboy85 wrote:
Its in my nature to help those who are in trouble.Yeah she could have dealt with it on her own but if i was in a trouble some situation i would be glad if someone helped me.What goes around comes around.Anyways with regards to the girl you guys asked what did i observe?Well for one i wasn't as needy as i would have been in the past.I gave her SPACE to vent her emotions, which i think made her more open and i could have tried to persuade her to come with me when her friends were trying to get her to stay.Honestly, i would have been fine if she walked away at any moment during the walk as i would have done the same.Yes,there is a part of me that wished she would stay in touch and that would have been the desired outcome.The difference now is that i am not overly attached to that outcome.
:cry: oh god, oh god, oh god...

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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:29 am 
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caliboy85 wrote:
I don't man know maybe i was a little too attached with the idea of being unattached and not needing her other than that i don't see anything.I still don't believe that because you leave a club that has lots of guys and very few girls you have the wrong mindset.People go to clubs for different reasons.You can still desire to be in the presence of women and not act like you are pursuing.The two are mutually exclusive.I thought Unattachment was desiring to get them but not beating yourself up if you don't get the result you want.At least that's what it means to me.

Totally missing the point of why Grinus asked you to view it from a different perspective.

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 Post subject: Re: Strange experience
PostPosted: Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:45 am 
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Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
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I don't get it Prodigy or anyone for that matter.Please let me know what your perspective is on this,what i did wrong and what i can improve on.I am open to criticism.


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