Natural Freedom

Some of the women who write/text to me seem to have an overwhelming sense of desperation about them. I could be mistaken, and perhaps this is simple directness, but I'm siding on desperation. Slightly arousing to my predatory side, but more of a turn-off to my logical side (considering past burdening experiences with clinger types).

....background to this dialog: She was texting me questions about myself, and prompted me to ask her some questions about her. I asked the usual stuff; Favorite color etc... Most embarassing moment, Subtitles or dubs...

-Mornin

Sorry i fell asleep

-subtitles or dubs?

I am so sorry my most embarassing moment would be when i was walking off the school bus a week before grad tripped and landed on my face.

What do u want in a girl?

Dub?

-you know... Dubbing...

-nothing too particular. I'm pretty happy in my bachelorhood, but I'm keeping my eyes open.

No what's dubbing lol I'm a little cluesless I love subtitles are you looking for a girlfriend

I can't stand dubbing I didn't know it was called that I prefer subtitles

-I'm always looking for a girlfriend

Maybe it's me ***blush & smile****

-+grin+. Wow look at you! How lomg has it been?

Since what

-since you had any romance in your life?

I was in a relationship for 3 years with no love so it's been a long time it was an extremely abusive relationship

-oh yikes.

Yeah so it's been a while

I'm just looking for a man who wants to be number one and I want to cook and clean for someone that appreciates it and I want someone to give back the affection I give them

-I don't think you'll have a hard time with that. every man wants to be #1

Not my ex he would get mad at me he had head problems the problem is I'm not a size 5

-What's a size 5? Is that a skinny girl size?

Yes

-I see. But that's over now, right?

My ex yeah it's over.

-What's the dating scene like in (x-town)?

Not good that's why I'm talking to you

-You know... That statement kinda implies desperation and scraping the bottom of the barrel +grin+. I'm not offended though.

I'm far from desperate I'm sick of cocky farm boys and I'm not at the bottom of the barrel

-That's good

So what's keeping you talking to me

-getting to know you

Are u interested so far

=====time gap...working=====

? *** smile ***

-I'll level with you. I have a very busy life and am quite self-sufficient. Your very sweet willingness to cook and clean and be devoted isn't something I truly need in my life. Having said that, I'm willing to get to know you. We just might be able to have some fun.

So we are kind of clashing I am looking for a great guy to maybe eventually in a sense settle down I dot think I want to be 1930s devoted

I want my man to know he has a strong woman behind him

-1930s... Like the great depression?

I guess I would mean the 50s I would never want to live how anyone did in the dirty thirties but I just want to be the confident woman behind a strong man

-You sound very sweet.

Is that good or bad

-It's good

That's good doesn't seem like I'm the girl for u though

You sound like maybe you want something different but plz plz correct me if I'm wrong

-I'm sure you can find someone a little more suited for you.

Great another rejection

-FW:"That's good doesn't seem like I'm the girl for u though"
-You might consider not trying to disqualify yourself.

I know I said that because you didn't sound interested at all I would like to be requalified I am smart beautiful educated

-I have a question for you: Why do you want/need a man in your life?

I don't.

-It seems to me that you do.

-You have admitted the fact.

No I don't believe. I need a man.



If I had been inclined to do so, I believe that this one would have been pretty easy to play.

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I believe in gender equality using the strip club paradigm. While some men consent to throwing their money at pussy, I endorse women throwing their pussy at money. .

Oh yes.

Like thick smog on a cold morning, it comes up and chokes you with its thickness.

-

Now imagine the shoe on the other foot.

Imagine if you were a woman and men were writing/texting you and you were feeling the same thing. How would it feel to you? would it be appealing or attractive? You are not mistaken.

Directness has a different flavour to desperation, leaves a different taste in your mouth.

--

I did not get that thick smog in relation to her texts.

In relation to the texts, you are both leading and following, thats why she said you are clashing. She needs to follow and you to lead.
You are also replying to subconcious comments in the concious domain, hence the other disconnect later. You are trying to read beneath the waves and yet replying over them.

Personally, I would not have been replying to you, it was almost like you couldnt make up your mind and it came through in the texts (to me).

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.

I didn't like this one, Ruffy. Very unfocused and kinda pointless...quite boring really.

Also...like 'Grinus said...stop trying to get women to cop to unconscious evidence...it's like your schizophrenic and I'm telling you about a personality you have that you don't even know exists. Know the difference between conscious and sub/unconscious.

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

THIS^

Poor girl. I honestly feel sorry her.

However....

DO NOT WANT!

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“I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. . . ."

-Thoreau's Walden

I love the way you qualify girls, but you're wayyy overdoing the push/pull shit, like the other guys have said you're all over the place and again it's because you're trying to manipulate and aren't being genuine. Treat them accordingly, it's ok to holster your guns a bit, right now you're punishing good behavior.

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

Thanks for the replies fellas.

I was second guessing myself about posting this, but i figured it would at least be fodder for the mill. If I can help others learn from my mistakes, why not? If I can learn something I'm oblivious to, why not. ...Blind spots and all...

One of the things I'd like to point out about how I experienced this interaction was this: When the cook/clean subject came up, I immediately was reminded of the theme of Villar's book, and it was a definite turn-off, immediate-like. Here she is, a young woman from a small town, with a degree from a community college who's profile lists her as a "writer" (which to me says: "unemployed" since she's still working on her first book), and is 'okay with a boyfriend who isn't around all the time'. That has "I want a free ride" written all over it.

I definitely concur on PG's assessment of this script-flip on how attractive women feel when set upon by lonely men.

It just occured to me that I might realize how I came off as incongruent. By saying that I'm "always looking for a girlfriend" (which I am) and then later saying that I have no real "need of a girlfriend" (which I don't) is a contradiction to someone with a conventional relationship paradigm. In order to appear genuine, It seems I would paradoxically have to put up a non genuine front on one of these two elements.

Honestly, I wasn't really soliciting advice when I posted this, but I sure do appreciate it. I suppose I have a bit of a masochistic psyche that way

Edit: @TK!! Yeah... It's pretty obvious in retrospect (especially to forum members here) that I was mis-applying the copping confession on subconsious principle. To be quite honest, that way of doing is something that has never been in my style. I'll chalk it up to the stumbles & fumbles of trying new ways. .

@Mannija. You're right about the punishing of good behavior. I'm sure I could have found a more pallatable way of dishing out the same truth without coming off so harsh... After a re-read, I see that I basically said "I don't need you". I'm sure there is a better way to word it.

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I believe in gender equality using the strip club paradigm. While some men consent to throwing their money at pussy, I endorse women throwing their pussy at money. .

1. I don't think that is where you were in-congruent. You said you were looking for a girlfriend. Then she said maybe it's me and asked if she could fill the role.You didn't give her a shot and blew her off.

2. You also said you weren't looking for anything particular in a girlfriend. She asked what you were looking for in a girlfriend. After you said you had no preferences you shot her down for randomly suggesting conventional submissive roles like cooking and cleaning.

Two questions:

(reference to point 1) How do you say I'm looking for diamonds and then turn down some sparkly translucent rocks without using your appraiser's magnifying glasses to see if the sparkly rocks are authentic first?

(reference to point 2) How do you do say you don't know what ice cream flavor you like then turn down someone offering you vanilla flavor after you said you didn't know what flavor you like (read as flavor of girlfriend).

Three Things I Learned From This Thread:

1. Most things in life aren't about needs, but most things in life are about wants (hence why we advocate creating needs in women).
2. Being clear with yourself makes everything clear to a female.
3. Sometimes the best game is no game (you'll find out where you are faster and you can always switch to game if she's not choosing hard enough).

I agree that the best game is no game (But you have to have the right mindset for that to happen properly) I disagree with switching to game if she's not choosing hard enough, that shows attachment, unless you want to call giving space "game" which I don't consider it to be, but tomato tamato...

@Ruffy: Incongruent is the exact word I would use for that interaction, but it's good to keep fucking up and learning from your mistakes, from what I see you have sick potential!

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

Naw bro, you're misunderstanding what I consider game.

There's regular me.

Then there's me on steroids (game). Metaphors, punchlines, role reversal, slick phrases, and sometimes rhyming phrases.

Usually I do regular me, no game, super boring conversation. I give a small drop of steroid me.

I drop that shit more frequently with bitches choosing me less than with bitches choosing me more because I know bitches choosing me more are choosing me for shit I can't even tell about myself sometimes.

Truth is game and I'm the truth. That's what I mean. All I start doing is repping myself as the truth.

I also think you are being a little staunch about what I said. Also, I said it earlier in different ways but my game is just a really strong extension of my personality.

Not everything you change in front of a woman means attachment.

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I believe in gender equality using the strip club paradigm. While some men consent to throwing their money at pussy, I endorse women throwing their pussy at money. .

It's hard to tell the difference between subconscious and conscious. Some people are more aware of themselves. One persons conscious is anothers subconscious

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

Nope...concsious and subconscious is pretty cut and dry. Either you are aware or you're not.

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

Very much so, you did not give her a chance. She knew this, we knew this, it was very clear.
^THIS!!!

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I concurr that it is cut and dry.

I would add that the only time it does not appear to be is when you are not paying attention and making assumptions. If you are there, in the moment, it stands out like a sore thumb.

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.

Agreed once the Kidd shared this insight I was observing people in general and I noticed there were actions that they were aware of and things they had no clue they were doing especially when it came to the female and male dynamic and when it came to people higher in status. I was amazed by how different people treat each other just off front & clout a person has.

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~There's weakness in the hearts of all humans are you afraid to acknowledge yours... ~
Mr. Todo

Fair enough, I just don't like working for my dinner so I don't give a shit to do any of it, to me less is more...but you sound like you on crank is effective so more power to ya

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

This still doesnt make sense. Guess I'll have to experiment and see

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."