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reality check- 'pavlovian effect'?
http://www.naturalfreedom.info/viewtopic.php?f=21&t=1975		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Sniper [ Fri Feb 10, 2012 12:57 am ]
Post subject:  reality check- 'pavlovian effect'?
Hey Kidd and Grinus,

I have been doing a lot of observations lately and tapping into my subconscious mind. Now I hit something. It's a bit hard to put my thoughts into words but I'll try...

whenever I see a woman and feel something I observe it and now after practicing it for some time I can observe things on a 'micro level'.

So I noticed something... I already thought about it before and spoke to Grinus about it but now it has hit me on a much deeper level than before. So I want to share and then ask a question...

We already talked about the fact that a man has two instincts in regards to women:

1. the sex instinct
2. the Protective & nurturing instinct
http://www.naturalfreedom.info/viewtopi ... =17&t=1528

Now since most of us were raised by our moms and women in general (some had a nanny, we all had female teachers in school in our young years, in kindergarten and etc...)

Now even if someone grew up hating his mom, his teachers and etc...deep down there are always some good memories and now I think that it serves like a 'pavlovian effect'.

Let me explain (or at least try....)

when you were young and you did something good- the mother, the teacher, the nanny, the kindergarten teacher and etc.. would give you a good feedback. And then you felt good...

[ img ]



when you were young your mother made you your food and took care of you (that is, for most of us anyway...).

So could it be that now when we see a woman that has certain traits And does something for us (it doesn't have to be something physical it could be even a smile)

that it serves like a 'pavlovian effect'?

by that I mean that we are not always conscious of it. :geek:

for example: you saw a woman with certain traits and she even did something nice for you. Even just gave you a nice smile...

Now, your subconscious links that to that good feeling you got when your mom, kindergarten teacher, nanny or school teacher did something nice for you OR gave you a good feedback when you did something good...


[ img ]

And all of a sudden you feel there is something in this girl (like she activated something in me but I don't know what it is....) and people who don't understand think it's attraction\love\bond\connection and etc?

I'm having a really hard time putting this into words so if you need me to clarify my question please tell me.

[ img ]
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Fri Feb 10, 2012 1:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: reality check- Kidd and Grinus help needed
Nope. I know that each woman are their own entity...so I don't associate good feelings from other women on yet other women. I know they are NOT my mom. :ugeek:
Author:  peregrinus [ Fri Feb 10, 2012 11:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: reality check- Kidd and Grinus help needed
You are making assumptions about the woman.

You are not observing HER fully.

You are observing bits of her, then making assumptions and linking things to her from other women.
Jumping to conclusions without observing the evidence.

You are giving her far too much credit because of this.

You are also doing both yourself and herself a disservice, you are not being present with her.
In a funny kind of way your mind is with the other woman who you are thinking about, not the woman in front of you.

She is not your mother, or any other woman, she is her.

-

This also comes back to a lot of comments on the board about how you see a few signs and then jump to conclusions about traits in women, rather than watching/observing and seeing how they really are.
(I mean specific women, not women generally)

It is also tied to the black and white thinking issue.

-

If I was to give a certain example:
A woman who was blonde and a certain shape, behaved in a certain way, treated you well and you got good feelings from it when you were younger.
You are now saying if you see a woman who fits that profile now, you anticipate those same feelings from her, so are leaning towards expecting them from her and hence treat her the same and expect her to treat you the same as that woman from your past.

How much sense does that make? really?
She is a different woman, with different experiences, is very unlikely to be the same.
Author:  Sniper [ Fri Feb 10, 2012 11:54 am ]
Post subject:  Re: reality check- Kidd and Grinus help needed
Thank you Kidd and Grinus,

guess more observing for me (and thinking) :geek:
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Fri Feb 10, 2012 4:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: reality check- 'pavlovian effect'?
Yeah...get with it, ShitZebra! :ugeek:

Also...this shows that you haven't actually been treating some women accordingly...you've been giving some of them benefit of nostalgia for other women...that makes me sad. :cry:
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