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 Post subject: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:01 pm 
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How do I lower the defenses of people I have consciously engaged in the past? Possible?

Due to my ego outbursts people know far to much about me :oops: :| . How can I reverse that so I can again move unrestricted. Again is this possible?

One thing that really really confuses is me. Is that science, psychology pretty much every discipline would suggest the male that is "percieved" as the most dominant. Would get something like 90% of the females. How is it they would feel attraction if they don't "percieve" you as the dominant male.

I remember you talking about those girls at the bar for example with the guys and you kept normal body language but used your eyes, when the guys couldn't see you. I'm not much of an actor though. But I really really do not get it. Never have.

I kinda regret the phone recording app glitching out, because it feels like I'm trying to act with half the steps.

I feel you on the whole makes life easier thing though.

It'd be interesting to be able to see my body language, to observe the way that I communicate with others instead of being so focused on one side of the communication.

How much beta do you put in your body language? I think I initially overdue it perhaps, seperate from the fact my ego then kicks in after.

Things keep going the same way, and although indifference has improved a lot I'm not indifferent enough and in order to get to the next level. My ego is going to have be overridden. :|

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A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. True power isn’t controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. -Rational Male


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:20 pm 
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Morpheus wrote:
One thing that really really confuses is me. Is that science, psychology pretty much every discipline would suggest the male that is "percieved" as the most dominant. Would get something like 90% of the females. How is it they would feel attraction if they don't "percieve" you as the dominant male.
This also leads to who is the 'most dominant' male?

If you look at examples around you, it is rarely the person who psychology, popular culture and films would have you believe.

So, what you are asking here is:
what is hardwired into females and males as the dominant traits?
What trips those triggers in them to 'percieve' someone as the dominant male?

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:38 pm 
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Like the saying goes...it's the quiet ones you have to worry about. 8-)

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:43 pm 
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Brother Morpheus may I suggest that the first thing you do is believe that the past is over.

Be Well. Then, Get Better.
Sleep


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 6:48 pm 
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Yes, and how can I embody them.

How can I put myself in the position of having the most power and influence without conflict?

The past is over. But idk if it's going to limit me.

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A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. True power isn’t controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. -Rational Male


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 7:50 pm 
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Morpheus wrote:
The past is over. But idk if it's going to limit me.
See the contradiction.

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By searching first and posting questions only if you find no answers, everyone will be much happier
No matter HOW smart you think you ARE, there will ALWAYS be somebody who is smarter than you. So never underestimate people.


Fravia+


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2012 9:20 pm 
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Morpheus wrote:
I remember you talking about those girls at the bar for example with the guys and you kept normal body language but used your eyes, when the guys couldn't see you. I'm not much of an actor though. But I really really do not get it. Never have.

he can becasue he don't want to control them.


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Thu Jul 05, 2012 12:49 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 26, 2012 8:40 am
Posts: 17
Location: Sydney
Morpheus wrote:
How do I lower the defenses of people I have consciously engaged in the past? Possible?

Due to my ego outbursts people know far to much about me :oops: :| . How can I reverse that so I can again move unrestricted. Again is this possible?
Hey mate,

I don't know you and I've only been part of this forum for a little while but I just wanted to share something about what you've written above. It might be totally off but it's just something that I noticed.

From the small amount of your posts that I've read, there seems to be a common barrier. It's not that you don't know how to be the most alpha or control other peoples perceptions of you, it's that you think you need to. It's that you think you need to manipulate how the world perceives you so that you can "...again move unrestricted."

The question I have for you is: what's stopping you from moving unrestricted right now?

What's stopping you from doing what you want? Living your life on your terms? Being happy, fulfilled, and free, regardless of what other people think?

Sure, other people are going to perceive you in a particular way. They're going to come up with judgements and criticism. They might even say things behind your back. But how does that stop you from doing what you want?

The problem, from what I can see, isn't that you're not free. It's that you're using that freedom to focus on trying to get permission from people around you rather than using that freedom to just do what you want.

I might be off target here and you might be talking about something completely different but as I don't know your obviously long history on this forum, I can only go off what I see. I wrote a big post about this here that might help explain what I mean: http://www.attractioninstitute.org/find ... with-women

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Leigh Louey-Gung

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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Thu Jul 05, 2012 1:34 am 
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No Leigh...you're right...I've been beating him over the head with this for YEARS now. :geek:

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 3:06 am 
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Like others have repeated above, there will never be any magical solution that will just make everything ok and make everyone "allow you to be the person you always wanted to be - free"

At some point you just have to make the decision to do it, fuck what others think.

I had an experience just this Monday evening that illustrates two points in this thread. Went to a friends BBQ party with a group of guys, all of us planning on heading to a music festival to see a band we like after some food and drink. All of these guys are closer with the party hosts than I am, and eventually when I was like "yo should we head over to this festival?" Everyone kind of blew the question off, I think because they were all having more fun than I was as they are all closer with each other than I am. I didn't push it but a little later, one more time checked if they were planning on leaving anytime soon. Again sort of just got dismissed.

So I thought to myself, I really want to see this band, fuck it, I'm leaving - without saying a thing. I knew later I would get texts from them, which I did "where you at bro, why you just take off?" It wasn't easy knowing I would catch flack, but you know what, I gave them multiple chances and I wanted to catch this band. Freedom to act how I wanted - in spite of the consequences (which will always be both bad and good because life is always two sides of the same coin, can't be happy without experiencing sadness yada yada)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

At the show, I'm standing by myself. BY MYSELF!!

Do you think thoughts like "shit, everyone is seeing how big of a loser I am with no friends. I hope no one calls me out on being here alone. I hope no alpha makes fun of me for it...." didn't cross my mind. Of course they did, but because of years of employing my freedom in spite of them, I didn't much more than barely notice these thoughts before they were gone.

Now what do you know, 2 not-bad-on-the-eyes-whatsoever girls keep looking back at me from about 30 ft away over the course of maybe 15 minutes, the blonde on the right holding gazes just a bit longer. Smiles, giggling when I see them and they turn away. Lots of evidence.

Yet the thoughts "what if there is someone behind me?" "what if it's the booze making me only think they are liking what they see" and a hundred more. But I say to myself, fuck it, I trust my observations. Do what you gotta do.

The walk over...Holy shit, 30ft is a long ass ways for tons more thoughts to pop in my head: "everyone is staring at you approaching, what if they see you get rejected, what if everyone laughs, what if the girls are mean and WERE actually making fun of you being by yourself" and on and on.

Dismiss, dismiss, dismiss. You've done this tons of times before, take that bet on yourself. Because there never is 100% certainty, except the certainty in your freedom to act however the fuck you choose.

Whoa, this blonde is even better looking up close. Carry on.

(Smile) "Hey guys!" 8-) .......... :twisted:


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:09 am 
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Bravo Stephen!

FUCK WHAT EVERYONE ELSE THINKS!!!! Cause guess what, people only care about you when it's in their best interest to do so. Live your life for you...FUCK EM!!!!

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."


Last edited by Star_Above on Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:16 am 
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Quote:
people only care about you when it's in their best interest to do so.
You have been literally SHATTING gold lately...bravo, ShitFox! :ugeek:

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:20 am 
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I think he is getting closer to home.

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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Wed Jul 25, 2012 6:07 pm 
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Meanwhile the two girls are thinking 'wow, he's a man, he came here by himself.. How brave is that? I would never dare do that. I have to have the security of my friends with me. I want to meet him'

Followed shortly after by 'holy shit, he's walking over here, towards us, how do I behave, what do I say.. OMG!' *giggles*

Just think how few people had the balls to go there by themselves, stand by themselves and enjoy the band......

Nice post StephenP

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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 Post subject: Re: Remaking yourself
PostPosted: Sat Oct 12, 2013 8:31 pm 
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Location: Laniakea Supercluster
When you let go of self-credit, you also abolish self-condemnation.

I personally don´t care much of who I am.
(If "freedom" is void of mistakes, then it is not true freedom.)

Social drag is a small nuisance; what you are
becoming is where you need to keep your focus on.

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