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New thoughts over the last day
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Author:  Altair [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 1:15 am ]
Post subject:  New thoughts over the last day

So last night, I went out for a drink with two of my friends, and this morning a situation happened when I was getting lunch.

Um so we were at the bar, it was Thursday so it wasn't very busy. We were hanging out at one of the booths, and they called up two girls that they knew. So I'm fifth wheeling it apparently :lol:.
Everything was mostly uneventful, until we were about to leave. The bar was about 7 blocks from my house and everyone was coming back to my place to keep drinking, but I was hungry so I said I was walking to get food and then I'd meet them back at my house.

The girls started questioning where I was going, and one of them gave me really obvious body language for a second.

I'm kinda refining a theory on why they do this. Sure it could be/is attraction. But I'm thinking it also serves the benefit, of trying to be accepted within the group. Both of them wanted to be accepted. Perhaps a reminent from our tribal days where being accepted when you were physically weaker was needed for survival.

The other one was today when getting lunch at the mall

I was in one line and these two girls, walked by I saw them before they saw me. I kinda caught the girls gaze I was interested in for a split second, but she looked away and barely shifted at all. It wasn't intentional she just caught my eye, at the same time in the corner of my eye I saw every guy start to act slightly awkward (not really relevant to the story just interesting).
I kinda wrote it off, with so little evidence. I get that level of jocking dozens and dozens of times a day.

But then they picked the line next to me, so that was a small mental post it note. I glanced at her a couple times, while I was looking around so it wouldn't be super obvious :lol:. anyways I get my food and then pick a seat with lots of other seats around me my back is to them. They come by a couple minutes later, and pick the table right in front of me with their back turned, (There were plenty of other tables but they picked that one).

And then I was like :? , what now :lol: . I was trying to put it on them by having my back facing them but they just reversed it. With the way they're positioned there's no more I can do unless I actually talk to them. Do I have enough evidence to do to that? And what do I say? I don't have a problem holding a conversation once it's started but that intial starting it I still have hang ups on. Esp, in the day. In clubs it's way easier. I know Star already talked about this, but yeah idk...

Still kinda thinking..fuck shouldn't have pussied out :x ;)

Author:  peregrinus [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:50 am ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

My oh my, oh my oh my :D
Morpheus wrote:
The girls started questioning where I was going, and one of them gave me really obvious body language for a second.
Think about it, the answer is there, so obvious you cannot see it.. It is smacking you in the face and you think its a gentle summer breeze.

--
Morpheus wrote:
I was in one line and these two girls, walked by I saw them before they saw me.

I kinda caught the girls gaze I was interested in for a split second, but she looked away and barely shifted at all.
Barely? In other words: she did shift.
You 'Kinda' caught her gaze... :lol:
Morpheus wrote:
It wasn't intentional she just caught my eye,
Are you sure? It was fully intentional
Morpheus wrote:
at the same time in the corner of my eye I saw every guy start to act slightly awkward (not really relevant to the story just interesting).
This is VERY relevant.

Oh how there are none so blind as those can see.
Morpheus wrote:
I kinda wrote it off, with so little evidence. I get that level of jocking dozens and dozens of times a day.
Fair enough, I am gathering you kicked yourself later.
Possibly examining some of those ones you are writing off may be worth some of your time?
Morpheus wrote:
But then they picked the line next to me, so that was a small mental post it note.
Hm, evidence++
Morpheus wrote:
I glanced at her a couple times, while I was looking around so it wouldn't be super obvious :lol:.
What to you is not obvious is shouting to her.. She got it.
Morpheus wrote:
anyways I get my food and then pick a seat with lots of other seats around me my back is to them.
This is fairly obvious, a space or a push move. It is also called 'pussying out' as you put it later.
Morpheus wrote:
They come by a couple minutes later, and pick the table right in front of me with their back turned, (There were plenty of other tables but they picked that one).
Of course they did. Herein lies the lack of space, them stepping into yours.. Also known as the pull.

I could also at this point shout: Mirror
Morpheus wrote:
And then I was like :? , what now :lol: .
--->
With the way they're positioned there's no more I can do unless I actually talk to them.
Indeed. Hrm, I wonder, what did they want you to do? What were they baiting you into? What could you not ignore? <- clue 'THEM'
Morpheus wrote:
I was trying to put it on them by having my back facing them but they just reversed it.
Nice eh :D
Morpheus wrote:
Still kinda thinking..fuck shouldn't have pussied out :x ;)
You pussied out in the line, you pussied out when you sat down, you pussied out later when you did not speak to them.

Yeah, you did pussy out.
You were interested and you tried to play it coy, you hid from them.

You were not honestly expressing yourself.

Author:  Star_Above [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 1:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

The first set of girls the answer is so obvious...but I'll hold my tongue. SP... Nope, gotta hold it.
Quote:
I don't have a problem holding a conversation once it's started but that intial starting it I still have hang ups on. Esp, in the day. In clubs it's way easier. I know Star already talked about this, but yeah idk...
It's ok to start a convo if you notice the girl jocking you, in fact you'll probably have to with most of them...just remember though there's only 2 ways to talk to a girl, like you're above her or beneath her.

She's jock'n you in the line:

Above her: "You better not try and steal my salad" while said with a grin.

Beneath her: "Wow, you have beautiful eyes."

Or you can ask her a question while staying above her...or even just make an observation about the environment "Omg the line is so long" and if she likes you she'll be like "Omg I know eh" then go from there... Tons of ways!

Author:  The Kidd!! [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 4:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

Thanks for taking care of the heavy lifting, 'Grinus! :mrgreen:

Author:  Altair [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 6:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

peregrinus wrote:
My oh my, oh my oh my :D
Happens :oops: ;)
Morpheus wrote:
The girls started questioning where I was going, and one of them gave me really obvious body language for a second.
peregrinus wrote:
Think about it, the answer is there, so obvious you cannot see it.. It is smacking you in the face and you think its a gentle summer breeze.
Yeah she wanted me. There's actually a ton of evidence. She was always in my line of sight, when my one friend was lying on the couch she got up to come hang out with us, Left with my friends cousin and her friend. Not the guy she was originally with. He stayed on my couch, she ended up coming back after he was gone. I heard her knock but she was gone by the time I got the door. I think she was coming back for the orginal guy she was with perhaps...don't really know.
Morpheus wrote:
I was in one line and these two girls, walked by I saw them before they saw me. I kinda caught the girls gaze I was interested in for a split second, but she looked away and barely shifted at all.

peregrinus wrote:
Barely? In other words: she did shift.
You 'Kinda' caught her gaze... :lol:

Morpheus wrote:
It wasn't intentional she just caught my eye,
Are you sure? It was fully intentional at the same time in the corner of my eye I saw every guy start to act slightly awkward (not really relevant to the story just interesting).[/quote]
peregrinus wrote:
This is VERY relevant.
Yeah, like her eyes changed the path they were on for a second. It wasn't like locking eyes. Bad choice of words it was intentional but I did it before I was even thinking about it.
Yeah I guess it is relevent.
peregrinus wrote:
Oh how there are none so blind as those can see.
Morpheus wrote:
I kinda wrote it off, with so little evidence. I get that level of jocking dozens and dozens of times a day.
peregrinus wrote:
Fair enough, I am gathering you kicked yourself later.
Possibly examining some of those ones you are writing off may be worth some of your time?
Yeah, I suppose this is old thinking but I'm kinda expecting the level of body language that is in pua books. When in reality the hot ones have pro poker faces.
Morpheus wrote:
I glanced at her a couple times, while I was looking around so it wouldn't be super obvious :lol:.
peregrinus wrote:
What to you is not obvious is shouting to her.. She got it.
Think so? It's fucking hard to tell. :?
Morpheus wrote:
Still kinda thinking..fuck shouldn't have pussied out :x ;)
peregrinus wrote:
You pussied out in the line, you pussied out when you sat down, you pussied out later when you did not speak to them.
Yeah, you did pussy out.
You were interested and you tried to play it coy, you hid from them.
You were not honestly expressing yourself.
I was kinda hoping they'd talk to me. I hate starting conversations, hate it :| And not just with girls pretty much all strangers. It's that part where you engage someone, I don't speak loud so if they don't hear me it's really awkward repeating yourself. Or if they're not paying attention or in another conversation...but I suppose in her case she was wanting me to talk to her so yeah she'd be paying attention

Author:  Altair [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

Star_Above wrote:
The first set of girls the answer is so obvious...but I'll hold my tongue. SP... Nope, gotta hold it.
Quote:
I don't have a problem holding a conversation once it's started but that intial starting it I still have hang ups on. Esp, in the day. In clubs it's way easier. I know Star already talked about this, but yeah idk...
It's ok to start a convo if you notice the girl jocking you, in fact you'll probably have to with most of them...just remember though there's only 2 ways to talk to a girl, like you're above her or beneath her.

She's jock'n you in the line:

Above her: "You better not try and steal my salad" while said with a grin.

Beneath her: "Wow, you have beautiful eyes."

Or you can ask her a question while staying above her...or even just make an observation about the environment "Omg the line is so long" and if she likes you she'll be like "Omg I know eh" then go from there... Tons of ways!
Yeah, I get it. :)

It's that leap of faith though lol

Author:  Sai [ Sat Aug 11, 2012 8:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

he who hesitates, masturbates :lol:
Star gave you great examples of how to get the convo going.

Author:  GoldenBoy [ Sat Aug 18, 2012 9:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

peregrinus wrote:
You were interested and you tried to play it coy, you hid from them.

You were not honestly expressing yourself.
Sometimes, all I want to say to a girl is "Wow, you're beautiful", and going away, honestly expressing that her parents have great genes (at least for me).
Though I don't, because probably many guys say this (so she knows), and it just shows what kind of girls I like (so saying it has no purpose), not which ones like me ... so the other way around (even though they would probably be intrigued, if not, scared ^^).
Quote:
Above her: "You better not try and steal my salad" while said with a grin.

Beneath her: "Wow, you have beautiful eyes."
I still think if I said it to them, it would not have been with a pursuer / beneath 'mode', because the fact that she's beautiful to me doesn't mean anything other than that.

The above her comment, not said with a grin would have another effect.
The opposite is true I think (the beneath her statement not coming with a symp mindset).

Author:  Altair [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 5:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

Although your mindset behind it is solid it would not be seen that way by women. They would automatically associate it with a symp because they hear all day.

Author:  GoldenBoy [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 7:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

Morpheus wrote:
Although your mindset behind it is solid it would not be seen that way by women. They would automatically associate it with a symp because they hear all day.
Exactly, thanks

And the quote below too (I didn't feel like it, it was on my mind, like IF I talked to her I would say that, but not feeling like talking to her.)

I let the story too coz I liked it.
Say what you feel like saying.

If you are not feeling like saying anything, do not say anything.

If you feel it, you will have something to say.

THE ONLY thing getting in your way is thinking about it, that stops something popping into your head as it is busy thinking about it. If it were free and unoccupied it would come up with plenty of things to say, all by itself.

..
[small story]
I was wandering round shopping today and told a woman she had a mark on her face, looked like she had touched it after picking something up messy or something earlier.

She did have a mark, I thought she would like to know and commented on it without thinking about it. She was very grateful and mortified she had been walking around like that.
Of course she tried cleaned it off, then asked me if it was cleaned to which I said no, this repeated a few times, till I took her cloth and cleaned it off myself.

After a guy points something like that out and talks to her like nothing is wrong, watch her relax, a lot - how many guys would do that? really?

This one simple comment and the following actions lead to about 20 minutes of conversation and quite a few laughs. It was not a line or planned

Then she was shocked when I was about to walk away, she even questioned me about it. I replied that I had done what I intended in pointing out her 'mess' and enjoyed the conversation, that is where my thoughts had ended.

For some reason my phone now contains 1 more number than it did before I entered the supermarket. I did not ask for it, it was provided and entered without any effort on my part.

Author:  fufe [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 9:39 am ]
Post subject:  Re: New thoughts over the last day

GoldenBoy wrote:
Sometimes, all I want to say to a girl is "Wow, you're beautiful", and going away, honestly expressing that her parents have great genes (at least for me).
Though I don't, because probably many guys say this (so she knows), and it just shows what kind of girls I like (so saying it has no purpose), not which ones like me ... so the other way around (even though they would probably be intrigued, if not, scared ^^).
And they often know already, before you say anything to them..

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